How to Be a Good Loser

The longer you play poker, the more you change.

I am talking about how you treat the other players. When I first became serious about poker in the early 1970s, I was full of spit and vinegar. While I could be a gracious winner, I could be hell on wheels when it came to losing.

In one tournament when I was knocked out 'on the bubble, I got up to leave and another player at the table extended his hand.

I ignored him and headed for the bar. I pretended he didn't exist.

In the restroom, I would stare at my image in the mirror and repeat epithets against my opposition. I would mutter over and over, 'They wouldn't dare raise me with a straight...a flush...even a full house!'

When I left the rest room, I felt like Arnold Schwarzenegger. Nobody was supposed to beat me.

Well, years of playing this fascinating card game tend to mellow a person. You come to the reluctant conclusion that, not only can other people beat you, they will often beat you. The real question is, how will you react to a losing session?

Today my reaction is vastly different from what it was in the 1970s. Today when I lose a hand I thought I should have won, I smile and congratulate the winner. I have learned how to be a good loser.

Now before you get the wrong impression, I am not at all happy about losing. Far from it. But I am like the runner in a long distance race who has fallen down and is getting back up for another run at the gold ring.

When I tell the player who just beat me, 'Nice hand,' I am not lying. I mean it. But what I am really saying is, 'Nice hand -- but watch out for me next time.'

You accomplish several things by being a good loser. You calm yourself down and position yourself not to go on tilt. You make the winner and the other players smile. You keep tension from overtaking the tale. And you set yourself up to win.

When I first arrived in Las Vegas and began meeting and even playing against some of the legendary gamblers, I heard someone uses the phrase 'high style' when referring to another player. I asked him what he meant.

His response was, 'High style means you're a complete gambler. You're as good a loser as you are a winner. Only a few players have it, but the ones who do are miles ahead of the game.'

If you decide to take up poker -- and I strongly urge you to learn the game -- do it with high style. When you lose, smile, congratulate the winner, and learn from the experience.

Because in the long run, the only way to become a real winner is to be a good loser. Let the games begin.

Author: Geno Lawrenzi Jr.

(Geno Lawrenzi Jr. is an international journalist, magazine author and ghostwriter and poker player who lives in Phoenx, AZ. He has published 2,000 articles in 50 magazines and 125 newspapers. If you want to share a gambling story or book idea with him, send an email to glawrenzi@gmail.com ).